saw this quote "Tear from the eyes is like tear in the hrt" the word "tear" have two different meaning, yet it portray a very good tinking ....
lets see, when was the last time i cried? onli a few days ago, and how does it feels? hrt pain. thats the meaning behind the quote.
when i listen to phrases be it from anime or songs or tv shows, i somehow tend to link it to feelings that i had before. and normally, it will end up bad. yeap.... i guess this is wat happens when there is too many knots in the hrt.... u cant tear them apart, and it will add to the pain.
someone told me that, if HE is so impt to me, why dun i just tell him? well, i dunno how to tell him. no, it is not that simple as it seems, there were other issues in it too. if it was as simple as it is, i would hav done it long ago, when i was more courageous.
things are more complicated than it seems, and forgive me, as some issues i dun wanna bring it up. not that i dun trust my frenz, just that there are tings to be kept realli by myself.
love make people blind, and it also make ppl shine. dun understand? go look at those who are in a rs now, esp those whu just started, see the shine in their eyes? that is what i call true happiness.
when was the last time i had that kinda shine? when was the last time i actually could laugh out so happily that i hav nth held back?
on my bdae, after recievin so much from everyone, the onli ting that stop me to be realli super happy is him. yeap. i realli miss him on my bdae... but what could i do? he is not coming over nor i am flying back. stupid tinking i noe. i miss his hugs and kisses. i rem for the past 2 yrs, my bdae wishes were that to recieve his hugs and kisses again. the cuddling in bed, feelin his warmth. him tellin me that he loves me, all the small actions. those wishes never came true.... this yr wishes, was kinda complicated, but since it is still within a yr, i will onli disclose it next yr... coz i still believe that wishes make on the 21st bdae is always the one that will come true. i have up to next yr....
i noe, i am just feeling lonely.... in the aspect of love.. i knoe i have many frenz whu love me, but that is in the aspect of frenzship. and those are two seperate areas, which cant replace one another.....
when will i be shining again???? haiz.......
Considered for a second about our love at {8/27/2005 03:49:00 AM}
