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Monday, August 27, 2007

Update ......

okok, i am updating, cant i just take a break.... nvm

well, not realli tat much to update, borin life. with the exception of not havin to bath at home for almost 1 week, havin to travel thousands of kilometer just to have a bath. damn pipe choked in the bathtub. bloody hell, it makes showerin a fuckin expensive necessities, considerin that i am so used to havin a bath early in the mornin and one when i get back. haiz. cant wait for that plumber to come in on thurs to get that fixed.

went to Mambo @ Metro last fri, as expected, boring. haha. but well, the theme of the nite was Sch Uniform nite. of coz, i didnt wear mine, which i am pretty sure mum hav alreadi used it as rug. haha. however, it was quite a pretty scary nite. considerin the haunted moments of the past. haha. i even saw SAJC and St Nic uniform appearing. wtf. that isnt the worse, rem when u were in sch, there bound to be this over size gal who tucked in the uniform so tight, and tink she looks the best. i called them the "Big White SHark". i nearly spewed out whatever i had in my mouth. apparently i saw a couple that nite. hauntin moments. and there are also those who tied the double ponytail Sailormoon look-a-like. nth to see in front or back. hmmm, that is sure a head turner, and the next moment ppl die of overdose of horror. haiz.

of coz, good and bad comes together, saw a few pretty hot chics, though they are not wearin proper sch uniform, but a shirt and mini skirt doest he job perfectly. oh ya, lets not forget one very impt lesson learnt, the next time u peeps goes for a Sch Uniform theme party, dun wear black and white. for a moment i tot Metro hired so many waiter and waiteress. haha. that was seriously hilarious, when one of my frenz tried to order "two large chips and 2 coke" from a Waiter-wannabe. haha.

with work on sat, i didnt stayed long, dun hav the energy to stay long. hmmm. sat went like chaos, i seriously would say chaos. by the time i finish work, after had my precious shower, went over to chill at her place. supposedly to go down Hits for Apple's bday, ended up fell asleep in the soft embrace. by the time i woke up, was alreadi sunday afternoon. hai, why does good times always end so fast.

pretty full on in terms of work, dun wanna dwell on it. jugglin between her and work is a tricky one, yet we both manage to tackle it pretty well. i guess i am just ready for this kinda no-strings-attached. anytin more than that, dun wanna tink.

anyway, gotta rest now, will update if i hav the time. ciao.


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Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Thoughts ....

i noe i will cause a big hoo haa by postin this post. but i realli cant find anyone who i can tok to regardin this. i got to get it out of myself before i go into anor round of depression again. feelin the symptoms, been tryin to control it, am on the verge.

this yr bday, i am not happy. though i had all my days fully booked, though i get myself thrashed almost every nite. though i am with frenz that care. but i was still not happy. i felt lonely, and its the loneliness in the middle of a crowd. sth is missin, just felt so empty.

i am not sayin that all my frenz who celeb with me is not close to me. but its that kinda emptiness that i feel, i appreciate all the efforts made, i can feel the warmth, yet i still dun feel happy.

was told that i give ppl a sense of insecurities. was told that i can be committed into a frenzship, but the next moment, i will pull out. is the sense of insecurities that frus ppl out, coz when i pull back, i realli pull back.

was told that ocz i get committed to a frenz, i tend to vent out whatever i hav onto that person, which in turn hav a vicious cycle. a cycle that have a butterfly effect. and becoz the time frame is short, i lose my attention fast, i start to see the effect that i caused, and i dun wan it to continue, and that is the time i pull back.

was told that with my priorities bein set out, it gets to a point whereby i will try to seek perfection in it, thus givin myself too much stress.

i dunno, too many chain of tots, i need to sort it out.


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Saturday, August 18, 2007

Yummy ........

last nite dinner was yummy. guess what, Lester was the main chef. haha. great super honour man. haha. those two are realli funny, haha. nvm.

oh ya, due to the fact that we were all very hungry, haha. forget to take picture of the dinner, was literally gobbling everyting down. so did took a few pic of the bones left, haha. dun say dun hav la. haha.

okok, proper update. went over Carene's place at arnd 5 plus. just in time to steal some cookin short cut again. haha. esp the corn tingy, that is so freakin convenient. haha.

after poppin the veggies into the oven to roast, me, Les and Carene headed over to Captain Stirling for the Choc Martini treat, tradition. hmmm. picked up Jessie on the way. after this time round, no more goin back there for the Choc martini. lose standard like crazy. haiz. but nvm.

yakking yakkin, and den stomach growling. haha. headed back home, poor Darren got comment from the bdae gal (ME) that he put on weight and it shows very clearly in his butt. haha. well, he asked me one wat. haha.

anyway, with both the chef in the kitchen, Jessie went a bit high, but the funny ting is that all she had was a glass of coke, no alcohol at all. hmmmm, apparently, she gets high on sugar. haha. save money sia. haha.

dinner was served. T-Bone steak, roast veggies, corn, brocolli. and of coz, LLB to acc. haha. it was then that i finally understand why i always eat rump steak. haha. coz i dunno how to cut the T-Bone properly. haha. we were all bloated and decided to become couch potato. haha. was watchin Bourne Supremacy on tv.

out of nowhere, Darren commented that i shld cut the cake before the clock strike 12, haha. damn funny guy. so anyway, out comes the cake. yummy, choc choc choc, and sparklers and candles and more choc. haha. that choc is makin me go ya ya ya. haha.

love the cake, choc was rich enuf yet not too rich, and there was the almonds on the side, yummy. the choc was so nice that i nearly chew the candles off, coz there was choc on it. haha. funny.

anyway, after cake, they wanted to play mahjong, but me wanna slp, the alcohol in me is makin me slpy, so ended up i went to orh orh, with them still playin mj. haha. internal body clock at work, haha. true enuf, woke up at bloody 8am today. but manage to curl back into slp till 12. haha.

had a realli good day yesterday. Thanks Carene and the whole ya ya gang. haha. love u lots. haha.


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Friday, August 17, 2007

Yes....

okie, recieve a few phone calls today. from the beloved Lyle and Tegan who went singin the moment i said hello. haha. that was funny, for one moment, i tot is that stupid phone call from coca-cola which is automated. haha. felt so good, haha.

den i recieved one from work, hesitated in answerin the phone. but still did. and now i am officially the AM, finally. proper pay and proper stuffs. good. finally can start my savin plan. oh ya, did i say i saw this car for sales which i realli interested to buy????. its a Lancer, white with some body kit. hmmm. haven had time to call the owner. but yeah.

gettin ready now, goin over to Carene's place for dinner. yeah, she is preparin a feast though. yummy. haha. might head down to Burswood later. sudden tot of goin there. haha. see how it goes. haha. ciao peeps.


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Happy Bday ...

finally, 23, not that excited as 21, yet still a bday.

recieved my first pressie today at work, pretty interesting. was a large bottle of coke, a big box of chocs and a milo energy bar. haha. there is a meanin behind each. first, everyone noe i am a coke addict, haha. chocs is also one of my fav. as for the milo bar, well, apparently i always look lifeless, and the milo bar is supposed to give me energy. haha.

second pressie i recieve is from Megan, haha. she got me the angel figure and the best ting i like is the wine glass with some coloured rocks and a candle in it. realli creative. she was sayin that all the materials is from the shop, but i was realli surprised by her tots. it is the tot that counts. hehe.

third pressie is a top from Roads, evee bought for me when we went late nite shoppin today. i was actually searchin for a top to buy. just felt that i need a new top. was walkin arnd, didnt pretty much see anytin i like until the last stop. the moment i saw it, i love it. nth fancy, but realli nicey. hehe. thanks evee.

kinda laughin, with the tot that, on my 21st bday, the moment the clock strike 12, i went out for a walk in the freezin cold. on my 22nd, i was alreadi thrashed before i cut my bday cake. this yr, well, i am home when the clock strike 12. haha. isnt it funny? okie, maybe not to u guys, but to me, is like it feels funny. hehe.

time to slp, ok, i noe it sound stupid, but i tink i need to rest.

as for bday wish, hmmm, wait till i cut my bday cake la. last yr wish kinda came true, though not exactly wat i wanted. hmmm. i tink can reveal it now, i kinda wished that between me and him, there is an answer. so yeah, pretty much came true. haha. cant believe i still can rem. haha.
so as for this yr wish, well, i gotta tink carefully. there are always two wishes, one private and one public. normally the public one doesnt matter. haha. enuf of gibberring. time to go slp. nitez peeps.


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Sunday, August 12, 2007

Ice .....

isnt human funny? call it crazy, self-torture. wat am i talkin abt? well, such a cold weather, and i do mean cold, 4 degrees out there, and i had ice kacang. hmmm, crazy.

bday comin up in a few days, however, not much anticipation. why? coz hav been told that i am near 30 yrs old, bloody idiots. that sound so scary.

plans wise, well, nth much confirm, except for fri. not much grand plannin or spreadin over a few days. kinda dun see the pt to. dun see the pt to be the planner of my own bday.

anyway, almost half my life gone. sound so depressin, but u nv noe, it might even be at the end. was kinda wonderin, if i lost my memory tml when i wake up, will it be much better? will i still hav pieces of memory that will stay? will everyting just disappear, will i be the same?

if given a chance to turn back time, will there be decisions i will reverse, and how far back will i turn? if given a chance to go into the future, will there be ting i will want, and how far ahead will i go?

if given a chance to ask god a question, what question will i ask? if given a chance to end someone's life, will it be mine?

so many if, but to priorities it, well, i will choose to lose my memory. been tinkin of that for some time, will i give up all my memory? even the good ones? well, for me now, i rather lose everyting, and start afresh. a survivalist will survive.

this whole yr hav been a mess, with so many decisions made, so many directions taken, so many rushin abt, so many mistakes, so many regrets. let it begone, let me start over again. when am i givin myself the third chance to start again? i screwed up the second chance, in less den 2yrs.

unless it is fated that i will be a loner forever, i need the third chance. lessons are to be learnt, consequences to be taken, hurt to be mended, burden to be let go. what else will there be, for me to accomplish, before i give up?

cant tink, goin slp.


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A Cut .......

had the cut of the month. yeap, went to have my hair cropped again. of coz, it is always a package, had my hair coloured. and this time round, is sure to be considered as one of the longest. took me 5 hrs to get the hair done. all becoz i chose the colour, ash green.

double bleached my hair, grabbed the highlight, den applied the colour on. the effect, fabulous, love it. not the loud-grabbin-attention, but the subtle-cool-unknown. haha. yeah.

i realise i need to get the pictures. that all.


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Saturday, August 11, 2007

Mummy .........

okie, mummy comin on the 21st of Sept, yes, official liao. and she stayin till 30th Sept. wonderful. mummy also very funny, when ask her where she wanna go, she say she will follow me everywhere, hmmm. how am i supposed to brin mummy to Metro?????? haha.

nah, the plan now is still messy. a few places i must bring mummy go. one is Freo, coz mummy sure wanna buy fruits go back. mummy love the fruits here. haha. second is to Araluen, to see tulips since is perfect timin in spring. third is to Hawker's, coz mummy wanna see whether i used to work. fourth is TRS, coz mummy wanna see where i work now. fifth is Curtin, coz that is where i am grad lor, duh. sixth is...... i hav no idea. haha. shit.

oh ya, and i alreadi put down a list of ting i wan mummy to cook. haha. poor mummy, no break for her. haha. who cares, i wanna eat mummy's cooking. haha. so, the confirm plan now is that, she arrive on friday nite, shld be headin home to slp. den on sat mornin, go grocery shopping. haha. shld be headin down to subi kua, den to NB, den to city bah. haha. other den that, i dunno liao. shit. haha. no, i am not bringin mummy eat dim sum. haha.

might be headin down to swan valley bah, hmmm, but mummy dun drink one wor. haiz. also dunno go down there do wat, buy choc meh. haha. where else in perth can bring mummy? hai. headache lor.

if it is my bro, den easier liao. haiz. feel weird to brin mummy go out yum cha lor. haha. dun even consider clubbin. haha.

it is now, that i realise i dun even noe what mummy like. haiz. cant believe for the past 23 yrs, i dun even noe wat mummy like. all i noe is she keep workin and working. haiz. although i noe that mummy just wanna see me, but cant ask her to really sit at home and do nth lor.

oh ya, still got King's Park, wanna show mummy what entice me to come back to perth. hmmm, mummy nv realli understand why i will come to perth. haha. where else???????? must take mummy go sit train and bus. which i am super lazy, after havin a car. haha. that will let her know why i insisted on buyin my car. haha.

wat else, wat else, brain storming........


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Thursday, August 09, 2007

NDP ....

okie, seems to be traitor if i nv post this post.

Its NDP' 2007. seriously i dun care. tried watchin the first part of the NDP online, well, this yr is streamin is much better, but i onli saw the last part of the parade. it kinda turned me off. is like tryin to show off all the defence stuffs. is like propaganda. brainwashing. givin ppl a false sense of security, givin the impression that leave it all to the govt. haiz. Simpson is much more interesting.

anyway, must say Happy bday to Cathy!!!!!! i nv forget urs. enjoy ur day k.


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Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Desire

Desire {noun} - a strong wish for something

my recent desire

1) fruits

2) booze

3) break

got them all today, good work.


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Ignorance is Bliss ....

Ignorance, is "lack of knowledge, awareness"

Bliss, according to Webster Dictionary online, is "complete happiness".

so according to this phrase, the lack of knowledge/awareness is complete happiness.

i realise i have always wanted to know, the urge to know, the belief that knowledge is power.

and maybe is becoz of this, i keep searchin for answers, for knowledge.

but at the end of the day, i realise i am gettin realli miserable.

maybe that is the reason why secret exist in this world.

when pursuin wat is meant to be secret, is like searchin in a fog.

secret is arnd us everyday, every moment, every second.

sometimes, secret will unravel when time is ripe.

when it is meant to be unravel.

end of the day, ignorance is bliss

cheers


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Sunday, August 05, 2007

Reflections of the yr ....

comin to the age of 23, a yr is abt to pass. lotsa tings happened.

Frenz - lost most, make few.

Work - not here, nor there.

Study - finally over.

Rs - not included.

Family - not much changes.

Money - JIT system.

Emotions - half gone

Thinking - cynical

that is just a main gist of the areas of my life within this yr. will elaborate if i hav the mood.


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Never again ........

i swore to myself, this will be the last time i will cry. pretty much u hav shown u hav moved on, and no pt me askin for a second chance. pretty much of all the sleepless nite tinkin what went wrong didnt help, pretty much it just happened as it did.

all i wan to say is that,

Thanks for bein my frenz, though for a short while. tings that u have done, i will nv forget.

like u makin me eat veggies, u introducin new words to me, u amusin me with ur fascinations, u makin me smile when i am down, u bein there when i was down and lots more.

but i guess all is in the past, the door is closed.

it does hurt, but i guess it is life, ppl come and go, and no pt forcin them to stay.

i guess i hav tried, but it might not be my best. or it is just a vicious cycle from the past.

i guess when i finally break this cycle, will be the day i will start makin frenz again.

i guess it doesnt matter that much whether i am tellin the truth or the lie, as the end result is the same.

i guess it doesnt matter what i wan, coz at the end of the day i will sacrifice all that i care for.

i guess i was nv ready.


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Blur .....

okie, after slpin in almost the whole fuckin day yesterday. met up with Teg in the hotel. pretty much slackin arnd, havin tickle wrestling and weird hotel staff. haha. the two of them is seriously funny, coz Teg is a super clean freak or shld i say she has bacteria-phobia, and Lyle tried to take her socks off and puttin at her nose. idiot. haha. so the two of them is fightin while i was watchin tv. the show on the tv is much more interestin den them fightin, coz they hav been fightin ever since i reach the hotel. haha. Teg was expectin me to help, but weighin the pros and cons, i tink i better keep out of it. haha

anyway, watchin tv half way, i practically fell asleep. by the time i woke up, the two of them are slpin like a pig. haha. guess i was not realli used to the pillows, me decided to leave. haha. Teg had a huge shock when she couldnt find me on the bed. haha. she tot i was bein kicked down the bed by Lyle. haha. that was seriously hilarious. nvm.

Teg flew off this mornin, and darn, we didnt manage to make her cry. haha. alrite, dun be such a meanie. haha. so anyway, the next time she is comin back will be in october, durin Rockingham set up. till den, the craziness will subside. haha.

had a pretty full-on week, i supposed. haha. it was seriously fun. cant wait for her to come back again. haha.

anyway, gonna rest today, esp when i need the strength to start work at 7am tml. haha. the good ting is that, at least i dun hav anyone breathin down my neck. yeah.


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Saturday, August 04, 2007

Madness ....

that was how yesterday pass. first i have to start work at 7am, when kinda ended at 7pm. great, kinda shocked when Mel threw in her resignation via a txt msg, and didnt rocked up to work. tell me abt havin manpower down every time i am in charge. luckily got maureen to come in the mornin, if not i will be on reg for the whole fuckin mornin.

sales was pretty alrite, jess came in lookin flustered. apparently she banged her mum's bf car which parked very near her. as she just got her license, she tot she could reverse out, but nah. pretty impressed with her. the guts to try.

anyway, before store closes, Tegan and Rob came into the store. i guess it was pretty alrite, not much comment abt it. haha, yes. if andre goes off at me on tues, i will bloody ticked. work aside.

came back home, rushed to shower and out of the door. supposedly meetin Tegan at the hotel at 730 and by the time i reached was almost 8. supposedly dinner at Freo, but by the time that gal get ready, was almost 9 plus. cool. wanted to hav dinner at Oriel's but guess what, their service sucks big time. waited almost one hr without bein serve.wtf. got me so pissed off that i walked out. if u are wonderin how come i can sit there for one hr, well, coz Tegan they all were sayin wait for a while.

so with me super hungry and angry, we headed straight down to Freo. lose the mood to eat. was pulled into a game of laser quest. haha, and with 3 of us as super amateurs, i didnt got killed that fast as that Lyle. haha. he literally went charging towards the opponent. and the winner of the team is Tegan, coz she literally stand in the energiser area. haha, apparently her gun is fucked. haha. it was seriously fun, considerin that the gun is super heavy. haha.

den we started our pub crawl. haha. first, headed down to Newport, pretty nice place, with live band. i am not realli a huge fan of live band esp when they are playin heavy metal music. haha. after that headed down to Benny's which also hav live band, but their music is more of Salsa music, after 11 is dj spinnin. cool. stayed for a while, den headed down to Sail Anchor to grab some booze. wanted to go down Metro Freo, but i tink is the fact that it was pretty dead, didnt realli wanna go in. so Lyle suggested headin back to NB, goin Connectionx which is a gay club. pretty cool idea.

before that, we stopped at Rob's place in Spearwood so that he could grab his uniform for work, they slpin over at tegan's crib. haha. headed down to Connections along James St. by then i was realli tired, coz i was the driver. haha. pretty nice place, nice crowd too.

weird ting is that i was asked for phone number from this super hot chic. haha, and Rob got so jealous. haha. too bad. by this rather cute guy tried to picked Rob up though, and u shld hav seen how they danced together, haha. lets say how abt a snake on a stiff pole. haha. seriously, those ppl at the club can dance. i was memerised by this gay whu i seriously swear can dance. haha. Tegan tot i was in a trance. haha.

the nite ended with Lyle pukin, oh ya i forget to mention that the moment they stepped into my car, they were alreadi drinkin, the onli time they were not drinkin is walkin between clubs. haha. got the idea. if i rem correctly, they each hav a dozen of Coronas each. haha. and one more ting is that, Lyle and Tegan had bladder problem, keep askin to go toilet, esp when i am on the freeway back to NB. nearly had to stop to let them out. haha. when back in the city, lyle had to rushed off to the train station to take a pee, i am pretty sure the driver next to me tot what the hell is wrong with him. haha.

all in all, it was a pretty good nite, i was seriously tired by the time i reach home, and not to mention we didnt had dinner at all. too tired to grab it anyway. haha.

dunno whats the plan for today, hopefully is just chillin out. haha, seriously broke, and did i mention i got a fine of 100 bucks for parkin. that is behind Oriels. fucked up.


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Thursday, August 02, 2007

Weird ...

is it that i have been taken for a ride for so many times, that when i hear it straight from the person, i kinda hav that heck care attitude?

so when i was told that i will be takin care of the shop for today, tml and next mon and sat. i kinda am like watever attitude. when i was told that she is helpin me, my mind beg to differ.

it is weird when i noe how much i wanted it, yet to view her as a help is kinda doesnt fit into the picture at all. so now her fav buddy lost favor, and she suddenly realise that i am there to help, and i get wat i wan?

that is so bloody shallow. she expect me to yak with her over my personal life, hav a good dream, she tryin to be nice, tink twice. i hav seen how she wreck me, and if she tink i am that stupid, well, too bad, i arent that idiot. childish tinkin.

all she care is the fuckin time limit, but she just dun seem to see the after effect of the job. so what if i take my fuckin own sweet time, but it come out as a perfect job? she just dwell on the fact that i took half hr more than the bloody allocated time. i dun take challenges as finishin in the fastest time, but doin perfect job. one that doesnt hav flaw, one that is up to standard. dumb ass.

imagine tellin ur boss how fast u finish the job but its crappy, and how long u finish it but its perfect? which one is a better option? esp when we dun wanna end up like Crazy Clarks. when the company focuz so much on merchandisin, it means it takes longer time. not just gettin the maximum number of stock in the minimum number of hrs.

anyway, work aside. requested off for my bday which i seriously dunno why. hmmm. maybe is the tot that i dun wanna work on my bday. cant believe anor yr hav past. reflections of the past yr is gonna be realli huge, after all so much tings did happen. will get it out when i hav the time to sit down and tink.

Evee's car got banged in the butt by some idiot. the alignment of the bumper is gone, which is bad, but the good ting is that it didnt smashed the backlights. will cost her less den 500 to get it fixed. but hell that is a fuckin lot of money.

anyway, gotta slp now, workin at 7am tml. ciao.


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Wednesday, August 01, 2007

burp ....

just got back from Teg's place. which i hereby declare, stayin in a hotel is seriously waste of money. why??? simple, u cant cook, nor they dun even hav a freaking wine opener in the hotel room. haiz.

anyway, last nite me, teg and lyle went to had dinner @ Sorrento. pretty good, yummy. haha. after that was the piggy back ride, and we got drenched in the rain. fantastic. tink i am fallin sick. and today we had Nando's, and a bottle of wine. haha. lucky for me is that i didnt drink much, coz on my way home, i was stopped for the random breath test. phew.

i will get tml off, as Teg is meetin up with Andre, which i dun particularly wanna be there. and friday we headin down to Scarborough for African-cuisine. and den to Freo. yippie. and sat nite i tink meetin up with Josh, Rob and Kylie for dunno what crazy pissed drunk session. or was it ktv at Hits???? and Teg goin back on Sunday. sad. yeah.

work was pretty bad today, when i got written up again. this time, i fuckin didnt sign it. i am not gonna be that stupid. plus her fav buddy requested to hav hrs bein cut down. haha. that was seriously funny. so much for pushin her up. haha. if she tinks that she can find ppl that can replace me, go ahead. fuckin not takin any of her bullshit. stress me out every single day and the fucked up part is that i am not even paid for that. dumb.

had a bet with lyle, sayin that 2 weeks from now, i will be written up the third time, and that will come to a official warning. so basically every two weeks, i will be written up. and both of us are guessin the content of the next one. lyle was suggestin i compile all the written and make it into a notebook, or shld we say a joke book. yeah. good entertainment. and perfect material for bitchin.

anyway, gotta slp now. workin tml, and guess what, there will be more "discussion" in the followin week. lovely.


Considered for a second about our love at {8/01/2007 10:58:00 PM} (0) comments
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The Lover

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Name : Sharon Phang a.k.a Stone

Birthdate : 17th August 1984



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